At the end of a sweaty 60 minute hot yoga session this afternoon with my sister, our teacher read a passage to us. I can not be sure if it was due to the light headed feeling from dehydration, that the chapter I am currently on in my book focuses on mindfulness or a honest to God connection, but this story stuck with me. As she spoke, I found myself feeling very aligned with the warrior she described.
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The story starts with balance. Our quest to constantly find it in everything that we do. "Work-life balance" is a common term that is tossed around at school, with my peers, in interviews and in my own head. At this age and time in my life, I feel grateful to feel so grounded. I am confident in my values and that I will allow those to guide me along my own life path. In my personal and professional life, I have many goals and I refuse to ever let there come a point at which I choose to pursue one so heavily that the other greatly suffers. Without my support system of loved ones, I do not see the motivator behind becoming professionally successful. Sure, accolade, higher education, making an impact and money (yes, I said it) interest me and are determinants of success in my future, but they will never fill the void that a life without family would create.
I am a hard worker, perfectionist and am extremely competitive. Yet I am also a lover, a dreamer and an unruly optimist.
Next, the story speaks of crawling. Staying close to the ground so that we are able to see the beauty in the moment and the struggle. While also learning about ourselves and our path. By crawling through life, instead of running, we are able to be present and appreciate the good with the bad.
Love is the moral of this story. The importance of making choices to walk alongside another traveler while listening to them and sharing yourself with them instead of pushing along alone. You will learn from them and they will guide you in ways that you never knew you needed. Life was not meant to be traveled through by ourselves. We fall down and wobble so that we may lean others to help us. Don't let your ego stop you from loving and creating relationships. As a very independent person, I understand the need to provide that you can do it on your own... trust me. Try to stay mindful that just because you can, doesn't mean you always should. Be courageous to open yourself up when you are the most afraid, broken and vulnerable.
Be authentic in every thing that you do and you will find others who recognize and relate with your true heart.
The last part of the story reminded me that I am stronger than I think I am. "Trust and keep moving." There is a reason that I am here, that I am challenged, that I feel heartache, that I experience loss. Though I am not overly religious, I am spiritual. I do believe that everything happens for a reason; that there is always a purpose. If I am tested, it is to teach and strengthen me. I am never given a weight (metaphorically or physically) that is too heavy for me to hold or lift if I convince my mind that I am able. However, it is important to understand our own strengths and limitations and be proud and humble of those without comparing them to others. We should be proud of who we are and what we are able to do without measuring against peers or professionals.
I am not less because they are more or more because they are less. "Comparison is the thief of joy."
Life is a constant balancing act and sometimes you will fall one way or another, but falling does not mean failing. Our journey is made up of peaks and valleys, but the glorious highs cannot be reached if we choose to give up while we wallow in our darkest trenches.
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As I sit here curled up on my couch and write these words, the satirical and nay-saying devil on my shoulder has some thoughts as well. "How can you be both motivated by money and goals for your future and also preach being present and thankful?" ... "If reaching the ideal state of balance is truly unattainable, then what is truly the point?" .... "Since when did you become such a hippie?"
But, I will choose to ignore those questions right now and sip my zen green tea with lemon. Today I am passionate about yoga and will most likely spend the majority of my night reading up on the teachings of Buddha and finishing my chapter on mindfulness in
The Happiness Project. Tomorrow, I may be whistling a whole 'nother tune. Though I may not move to India and become a Buddhist Monk in the near future (I have heard something about a vow of silence? Yikes!). I will keep this story in the back of my head as a constant reminder to crawl through life, to be both a teacher and student through love and always trust the path.
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Following class, I was able to find the author and exact passage online. You can read it for yourself below. I am interested to know if you also find a deep, personal connection to these words or if maybe I was truly just really feeling the Shavasana end of yoga mood.
Love Warrior, 5 Things I Know About the Path
..."If you were perfectly balanced- you’d never have to take any ones hand to steady yourself, and that would be a tragedy. There is no solid ground on the path – so don’t hold your breath till you find it. Breathe deeply and keep moving forward awkwardly. You can make it down the whole path imbalanced and flailing. When you fall, give thanks for the opportunity to rest. While you’re down, send love to every other path walker who’s down with you at that moment. Then get back up. Or crawl. Crawling is encouraged and respected. Path running is fine, but crawling is much better. Crawlers travel with their eyes close to the ground – so they never miss an inch of the beautiful, rocky path. Crawlers get less glory but learn the most about the path’s terrain.
Your fellow travelers are your teachers and students. Your relationships with them will be the hardest part of path-walking. To avoid humbling oneself into the role of student and courag-ing oneself into the role of teacher – many try to walk the path alone. But the path was not designed for solo treks. The path was designed to teach Love. Whenever you introduce your true self to a fellow path traveler and listen and speak and learn and stay with her for a while- that is called Love. Walking With and Staying With messy fellow path travelers for any length of time is Love. Love is the most brutal and beautiful part of path traveling. Participate. Learn from and teach every path traveler you encounter. Exchanging love with fellow path travelers is how we gather the wisdom and strength we’ll need to overcome the next obstacle on our path. Note – You do not teach by teaching- you teach by loving. Be humble and courageous.
You always have enough strength and courage and wisdom. You always have exactly what you need for your daily trek. Sometimes you won’t believe this- because you will encounter stretches of the path that are treacherous and terrifying, but if you give up in the middle of those stretches – if you sit down permanently in them- then you have to live there. Don’t live in the dark, scary parts. Trust and keep moving. There will be a clearing soon and you will feel the warm sun again. The One who created your path is outside of time, so your life is an epic movie that has already been scripted. Maktub – it’s already been written. You’ve already made it. So don’t plan or worry – your job is to Trust Your Path and participate fully and notice as much as you possibly can and keep on moving.
Don’t ever become proud or ashamed. Don’t become proud that you are further along than many travelers or ashamed that you are far behind others. Your position on the path relative to other travelers has nothing to do with your strength or stamina or wisdom or cunning. We are all in different places because we all have different entry points to the path. Where you are and where everyone else is along the path is none of your concern or business. Let that go. You are exactly where you are supposed to be, always, and so is everyone else. The portion of the path you wake up to today was written for you. Everyone is EXACTLY where she is supposed to be. You are not your own or anyone else’s path-planner. You are a just a traveler. You just keep moving. Trust the Path. Tweet: You are not the path-planner. You are a just a traveler. Keep moving. Trust the Path.
Follow in the footsteps of a billion other mighty travelers who have walked and run and crawled the path before you. Fear not.
Carry On, Warrior."
- Glennon Doyle Melton